Behind every great man... Reason #4

They say, “Behind every great man is an even greater woman,” but when it comes to this campaign I would have to say, “Behind every mayoral candidate is a wife who is slowly going crazy.”
Case in point: Tuesday is laundry day in our house. Which means Monday night I am busy collecting and sorting all the dirty clothes and hopefully getting a load or two started before bedtime. Then on Tuesday, it is the responsibility of whoever is in the vicinity of the laundry room at any given moment to make sure the laundering process is proceeding as scheduled.
This last Tuesday, I woke up to discover that my dear husband had taken the clean clothes out of the dryer and put the next load in. Except that the next load was one towel. ONE towel. Who puts one towel in the dryer? So then I looked in the washing machine and what did I see? The rest of the towels! Now I’m thinking, “Why didn’t he put ALL the towels in the dryer? What is wrong with that man?!!”
So when my husband came home that night, I was all ready to say, “Why did you only put one towel in the dryer? Do you know how much electricity that wasted?”
Before I could say that, though, my husband asked, “How come there was only one towel in the washing machine this morning?”
After much pondering, we finally figured out the mystery of the lone towel. Apparently, I had put the towel in the wash the night before because it was already on the laundry room floor. Then I went to get the rest of the towels, which were in a pile only TEN FEET AWAY, but somewhere along the route I thought of something else I needed to do, so I totally forgot about putting the rest of the towels in the washing machine.
I blame it all on the campaign.
Other things every person should know before his or her partner decides to run for public office:
• You will not see your kitchen table again for months. The only reason I know I even have a kitchen table anymore is that I know piles of papers can’t float in mid-air.
• You will eat more fast-food during the campaign than you have in the previous ten years. Home-cooked meals become something you only see in television commercials.
• You will feel compelled to always look your best in public. No more running to Walgreens in your pajamas.
• If you have teenage children, do not count on their support. By putting your name out in the public eye, you have made everyone aware that you are your children’s parents—a dirty little secret they’d been trying to hide for years.
• If you do ask for your children’s help, be prepared to pay. Telling them volunteering for a political campaign will look good on their college application means nothing to them unless it is backed by cold, hard cash.
• You will discover attributes you never knew about yourself (I am a champion honk-and-waver), as well as weaknesses (“Love your neighbor” is really hard to do when they’re running against you).
Above all, you will discover there are few things that can bring a husband and wife together more than supporting each other in a cause they believe in. Even if it does drive you crazy at times.